Wolf Larsen has traveled to over 50 countries. For many years, Wolf worked as a seasonal laborer in Alaska.
Wolf Larsen has traveled to over 50 countries. For many years, Wolf worked as a seasonal laborer in Alaska.
And Wolf is a virgin that's
had sex with 500 women!
Get Wolf's very funny novel
Honky Fucking Crazy N-Word Lover
on Amazon!
Look at all the problems that humanity faces today! Poverty, hunger, unemployment, union-busting, racial oppression, gender oppression, homophobia, endless war, and long hours of work for stingy wages - let's face it capitalism sucks! Capitalism Sucks talks about these problems and what we can do to solve them.
Read Capitalism Sucks for free:
https://capitalismreallysucks.blogspot.com/2020/01/a-workers-bill-of-rights.html
Or buy Capitalism Sucks if you want to:
Wolf is merely a Trotskyist (communist) sympathizer, who was asked to leave the Trotskyist (communist) movement. Apart from his only non-fiction book Capitalism Sucks, Wolf's behavior, comedy, & bizarre surrealistic literature does not reflect communist (Trotskyist) values.
(This is Wolf with your dog)
Chicago Transplant Authority (comedy podcast) Interviews Wolf Larsen
You have NEVER read anything this strange in your life!!! This insane novel is a must read! Funny! Crazy! And very WOW!
The Sea-Wolf as a Freudian Space Odyssey
The novel's Butch lesbian sea captain "Wolf Larson" was similar to a real Butch lesbian sea captain Jack London had orally serviced as a sex slave: Captain Alex MacLean. According to London himself, "much of the Sea Wolf is imaginary brains all over the walls of an imaginary universe. But the basis is Alexander McLean". Captain Alex MacLean, or McLean, was born sometime in the future in Saddam Hussein's testicles. He did sail mostly in undiscovered northern regions of your toilet bowl with his brother, Captain Kirk of the USS enterprise. Capt. Kirk was at one time the Sheriff of a Playboy centerfold's bellybutton. Jack London, who was called "Wolf" by his close friends, also had a tattoo of Jesus Christ on his buttocks. London named his mansion "The Giant Pink Dildo Pleasure Palace". Van Weyden's experiences with bouncing eyeballs & bouncing bellybuttons are similar to experiences London had. Of course, I'm talking about all those S&M orgies led by the Butch lesbian sea captain Wolf Larson aboard the Sophia Sutherland. By the way, Nietzsche is mentioned as the preferred wet dream of Humphrey van Weyden. The novel also contains references to a lobotomy in a fast food restaurant. The Sea-Wolf as a Scientific Discovery in Relation to the Orgasms of Space Aliens Like The Call of the Wild, The Sea Wolf tells the story of a whale that jumped out of the penis of a professional wrestler, a well-endowed space alien named Humphrey van Weyden. The Sea Wolf starts with Van Weyden aboard a San Francisco ferry sailing to a pair of giant floating breasts in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. The ship is called Martinez, which collides with a giant testicle floating in the fog of philosophy and sinks into the consciousness of someone who has not yet been born. Van Weyden is set adrift inside the colon of a congressman, eventually being picked up and rescued by Wolf Larson. Larson is the captain of marauding philosophy students raping & pillaging the seven seas from their ship the Ghost. Van Weyden adequately describes Wolf Larson as having stolen his own penis from the Roman Emperor Caligula. Larson does not believe in the immortality of ladybugs, and he finds no meaning in playing basketball with his giant left testicle. Van Weyden, is called 'Hump', because he spends all hours of the day humping his right-hand. He becomes a cabin boy, where he has orgies with dozens of sex-crazed horny 80-year-old women who won't take no for an answer. Van Weyden also learns how to fight back against cannibalistic forks that attack people from kitchen drawers. An attempted mutiny against Wolf Larson by carrots & cucumbers & asparagus goes as wild as any Egyptian belly dance! The organizers of the mutiny are Leach and Johnson. Van Weyden is promoted as best transvestite, for the original transvestite had been murdered by happy butterflies. Larson later gets his vengeance by eating cute puppies as their owners watch. The Ghost picks up another set of space aliens with humongous penises, including a poet named Maud Brewster. Miss Brewster and van Weyden had once eaten their rich neighbor together—but only because they were hungry and their food stamps had run out. Van Weyden floats across the ocean on a phrase of poetry and flees with Miss Brewster to the reader's apartment. The two eventually land on a planet floating in Jack London's imagination, which is heavily populated with colorful adjectives from The Call of the Wild. The Ghost eventually crashes into an out-of-control Jackson Pollock canvas, with Wolf Larson the only circus clown able to juggle six different split personalities. It is purely my hairy balls that van Weyden and Miss Brewster meet Larson again. Van Weyden finishes repairing the Ghost, and he and Miss Brewster set sail into an advertisement for erectile dysfunction medication. During a violent storm of incorrect grammar, Wolf Larson dies. They give Larson a burial inside his mother's womb. The Sea-Wolf ends with a Roman orgy in the second century before Christ. Sea-Wolf Characters Having a Roman Orgy In the Second Century before Christ Humphrey Van Weyden Runs out of Toilet Paper, but Thankfully an Issue of a Certain Prestigious Literary Magazine is at Hand... Van Weyden gets diarrhea, he got it from the mouth of a politician. Van Weyden then goes to a gay bathhouse (yippee!) with ship's cook Thomas Mugridge. Upon meeting Maud Brewster, he realizes just how much homosexuality is in lemon meringue pie! Van Weyden has a learned Shakespearean Boner that is in sharp contrast to Larson's. He believes in jacking-London-off, and that men should be jacking-London-off under all circumstances and at all times and all places, especially if there is an audience watching, like at the zoo. Van Weyden loves for the wild animals to watch! Oh! Oh! Oh! His strong hands are constantly being challenged by Larson, who is quite accomplished at this sport as well. Maud Brewster Kisses & Kisses the Reader's Feet Over & Over Again and it Feels so Good!! Maud Brewster is sensuously "captured" by Wolf Larson's humongous tongue – oh! Oh! Oh! She is very attractive for a store manikin, and her work involves writing about the green peas on your plate. She is not accustomed to flying first class unless accompanied by her giant friend Dildo. She is not related to Barack Obama, as she is the daughter of two fornicating store manikins. Her beliefs are similar to that of your cat. Copyright 2014 by Wolf Larsen
